Today is the 10th anniversary of my niece's passing....

Thanks Doc, for the reminder about what's really important.

That is one of the most tragic deaths I can imagine.   

For me, the hardest day of the year is tomorrow.  Dec 7.  That's the day my mother died, 39 years ago.   

I was 23.  Out of college, still single... although, my future wife was already at my side, helping me deal with the loss.   I *think* my Mom knew we'd be together, even though we hadn't formalized it yet.   Her loss was not sudden.   It was the end of a 4-year battle with Multiple Myeloma, a very nasty blood related cancer.  The LLS charity that you fund-raise for has helped a great deal in improving treatment for it.     

By the time she passed, it was more of a relief than a loss.   But, 39 years later, it still saddens me.   Dying at the age of 43, she missed out on SO much.   She would have adored her grandsons.  And they would have loved her.   Life is NOT guaranteed.  Not for a day, not for an hour.   We shouldn't waste a moment of it on things that don't add JOY to the world.   

Like most people, I often fail in this mission.    But, I will "always try"... as my mother always told me before taking a long car trip.  

Maybe, one day... I'll get it right.   

When Mom was first diagnosed, the doctors projected 6 months.   It was nearly always terminal.   She was put in a special program to test some new chemo drugs and they worked pretty well.   She made it a little over 4 years.   Long enough to see me graduate, see my sister marry, and meet the first of my sister's children, a boy.    The life quality (particularly in the last year) was not great, but.... it helped her see some big milestones.   I think she was more at peace as a result.

When we moved to Louisville 20 years ago, I became great friends with a man in our church who had MM.  He was one of the warmest, funniest people I have ever met and we were instant friends.  (He became 'instant friends' with pretty much everyone he met).    He had gotten some of the very early T-cell treatments from a clinic in Arkansas and it had been VERY successful.   He went into remission and lived a very good life for almost another 15 years.   But, it eventually did come back.  He lost Round 2 about 5 years ago.   I HATE that disease... and, all cancers. 

Mom is still with me.  I still hear her in my head saying, "Any job worth doing is worth doing well!".    And, a bunch of other stuff.   

I can't wrap my head around losing a 19 year old daughter, or niece.      That had to be awful.  I think I actually remember you writing about that on the old board?  Not sure if I've really been here 10 years, or just remember you talking about it later.    I think it HAS been 10 years.  

In an 8 month span one of my wife's best friends lost her 18 year old son to a tragic spring break accident and our niece, her brother's daughter, died at 19. (You probably recall the boy's death, he had just committed to play football at Notre Dame and he fell off a balcony at spring break. His mother was in our wedding.) You can't imagine how painful it was to go through the grieving process, attend the visitations and funeral masses. Absolutely heartbreaking.